Charles Barsotti’s drawing is set in a bar. The top of a Jack-in-the-box has just sprung open, and out of the box has popped a doll dressed like a businessman. This doll is happily addressing the bartender, and in the background another customer looks on.
Any caption contest drawing that features a box will inevitably elicit several variations on the line, “Think outside the box.” None will ever be as good as this classic from Leo Cullum:
Nevertheless, Barsotti’s drawing cries out for just such a caption, not only because of the box but because “think” rhymes with “drink:”
- “I always drink outside the box.”
- “I like to drink outside the box.”
- “I want to try drinking outside the box.”
Because the doll is bobbing up and down on the end of a coiled wire, I next thought of captions that played on the double meaning of the word bouncer:
- “You’re looking for a bouncer?”
- “I’m your new bouncer.”
- “Need a bouncer?”
The word “grind” also has a double-meaning that works in the context of this cartoon. As a verb, it means “to operate by turning a handle,” like the crank on the side of a Jack-in-the-box. As a noun, it refers to the kind of dull work that can drive a man to drink. So I came up with a few captions that focus on that word:
- “Enough with the daily grind.”
- “Give me a double. That was a hell of a grind.”
- “I deserve one after that grind.”
Then, sick of puns, I focused on the music that plays before the doll pops out of its box:
- “I never get tired of that song.”
- “Sorry, I don’t know any other songs.”
Now, let’s see how you did:
As expected, there were many “drinking outside the box” captions. The best included:
- “Time to drink outside the box.”
- “I’m drinking outside the box.”
There were even more “bouncer” entries, and I especially liked these:
- “I hear you’re looking for a bouncer.”
- “I heard you need a bouncer.”
- “Do you need a bouncer?”
- “I’m the bouncer.”
This next caption addresses the effect of so much bouncing: “I’m always a little tipsy.”
Many of you focused on the spring while highlighting an alternate meaning of that word:
- “I’m springing for the next round.”
- “I’ll spring for the next round.”
- “I’m springing for everyone in the joint.”
Several of you focused on the fact that the coiled spring unwinds when the box opens:
- “Five o’clock—time to unwind.”
- “I needed to unwind.”
- “Something to help me unwind.”
- “God, it feels good to unwind!”
A similar caption makes a clever reference to the handle one turns to operate the Jack-in-the-box: “I’ve been wound up all day.”
There were a lot of references to the name Jack, and these were the best:
- “Jack’s not a dull boy anymore.”
- “Soon to be Jack in the bag.”
- “Jack-on-the-rocks please.”
- “Jack in the glass, please.”
Those last two captions presume that the doll drinks whiskey, but the following entry presumes he likes something else: “Do you have wine in a box?”
Each of the following entries is better than my captions that allude to the music that plays before the lid springs open:
- “You’re tired of that song?”
- “Play me again, Sam.”
- “I can’t get that damn song out of my head.”
- “I thought that song would never end.”
Here are a few puns about “popping in/out:”
- “Just popping in for a quick one.”
- “Just popped in for a quick one.”
- “I was in the neighborhood and thought I’d pop out.”
My favorite of those three captions is the last one, as it recognizes the crucial difference between popping in (like customers in a bar) and popping out (like the doll in a Jack-in-the-box).
I love these two entries:
- “I don’t get out much.”
- “If my wife calls tell her I’m out.”
That last caption needs a comma after the word “calls,” but it’s really good.
Several of you focused on the fact that “Jack” is missing his bottom half:
- “No shoes? Are you serious?”
- “Sorry, left my wallet in my pants.”
A few of you drew a clever connection between closing time for Jack (which happens whenever he goes back in the box and the lid is closed) and for the bar:
- “Don’t tell me it’s closing time.”
- “I’ll be here until closing.”
This next entry works on several levels, all of which are good: “Straight up with a twist.”
When I first saw Barsotti’s drawing I imagined the doll shouting, “Surprise!” But that’s not funny because it doesn’t address the setting. Kudos, then, to whomever submitted the following caption, which adds three perfect words: “Surprise!…I’m an alcoholic!”
Congratulations for submitting so many good entries. Thirty-four deserved special recognition, and I don’t think I’ve ever highlighted that many for a single contest. I’m especially surprised that I liked so many puns. Choosing the best is not easy but I’m going with, “If my wife calls tell her I’m out,” even though it’s missing a comma.