Joe Dator’s cartoon is set at a private event in a fancy restaurant. The host, as well as all the men who have already been admitted to the event, are wearing suit jackets, bow ties, and denim cutoffs. The women are dressed appropriately.
The host is addressing a couple who are waiting to get in. He’s speaking directly to the man, who’s wearing suit pants.
I’m an attorney, and during the pandemic I have appeared in Zoom court countless times but have never once worn pants. I, therefore, submitted, “I blame Zoom.”
In the ‘70s, many restaurant owners tried to keep out hippies by posting signs on their front doors that read, “No Shirts, No Shoes, No Service.” My first caption (“No shorts, no service”) is a variation on that common phrase. I especially like the way shirts, shoes, and shorts all begin with the “sh” sound.
Because most fancy restaurants have a room where you can check your coat, I came up with these two captions:
- “Would you like to check your pants?”
- “We do have a pants check.”
My final two captions highlight the discomfort of the man who’s wearing suit pants and play on the double meaning of the last word in this question: “Do you have a reservation?”
- “It appears you have reservations.”
- “No, I don’t mean reservations about that.”
Now let’s see how you did:
Many of you acknowledged that the pandemic has forced everyone to spend an inordinate amount of time on Zoom, where pants are optional:
- “Sorry, Sir, Zoom employees only.”
- “Dress code tonight is business Zoom.”
- “I’m guessing you don’t work from home?”
- “The invite did say webcam formal.”
- “Everyone is still in Zoom mode.”
- “We all got way too used to Zoom.”
- “Sorry, Zoom attire only.”
Here are the best coat check references:
- “May I take your pants?”
- “Please check your pants at the door.”
- “Pant check is to the left.”
Here are the best reservation entries:
- “You appear to have reservations.”
- “I see you have reservations.”
- “Any reservations?”
- “Reservations?”
Here are the best “no service” entries, the first of which is identical to one of mine:
- “No shorts, no service.”
- “No jorts, no service.”
Here are the week’s best puns:
- “It appears you did not make the cut off.”
- “They cut them off after two drinks.”
And here’s the best sex joke: “My eyes are up here.”
I assumed the host is addressing the man, but this entry suggests he’s addressing the woman: “He’s not getting in here dressed like that.”
I mentioned earlier that I appear in Zoom court without pants, but this next entry suggests that judicial robes make it possible for judges to appear in court without pants even during in-person proceedings: “Actually, we’re all judges.”
This entry puts a spin on a common term: “Semi-formal.”
And the next two captions have the host implying that the man in suit pants has improper motives for refusing to wear denim shorts:
- “What are you hiding?”
- “Always the rebel, eh?”
I’ll conclude this week’s commentary with, “I’m sorry, but there’s a dress code.”
I didn’t highlight very many captions this week—only 2% of the 815 submitted—but that’s partly because so many entries went after the same joke (and many entrants submitted the exact same caption). That said, the competition among the highlighted entries is typically strong. The best, in my opinion, is, “I’m guessing you don’t work from home?”
ENTER THIS WEEK’S CAPTION CONTEST
Lawrence Wood has won The New Yorker’s Cartoon Caption Contest a record-setting seven times and been a finalist four other times. He has collaborated with New Yorker cartoonists Peter Kuper, Lila Ash, Felipe Galindo Gomez, and Harry Bliss (until Bliss tossed him aside, as anyone would, to collaborate with Steve Martin). Nine of his collaborations have appeared in The New Yorker, and one is included in the New Yorker Encyclopedia of Cartoons.